Grief Counseling

What is Grief?

Grief is the anguish experienced after significant loss, usually the death of a beloved person1. Grief is a natural reaction to experiencing a loss. Although we typically grieve the loss of loved ones, it can be perfectly natural to feel grief in other aspects of life. Examples of other types of grief can include the loss of a job/career, financial loss, estrangement, relinquishment of important capabilities, or an illness or injury.

Grief hurts, but it is natural and healthy to grieve. Let yourself experience your feelings, such as shock, sadness, anger, and loneliness. Don't judge yourself for any feelings, even if you think you should not have them. You might feel guilty or feel pressure to "get over it" from others. When the bereavement journey feels overwhelming, sometimes counseling can help.

Do I need Grief Counseling?

Your life changed when you lost someone. However, your life did not end.

Life after loss is difficult, but a therapist can help you process, accept, and heal from the death of a loved one. In grief counseling, you can begin to move forward from your loss and establish a new normal. In a time of emotional and physical loss, you can sometimes feel like no one understands your pain. Grief counseling can help you feel less alone. Anyone who has undergone a loss can benefit from grief counseling. You do not have to wait until grief has overtaken your life to seek counseling. That being said, there is no right or wrong time to begin counseling for grief.

After a loss, you may be experience some very intense emotions, and that’s okay. Committing to grief counseling is the first step you can take to learn how to get a handle on your emotions. If you’re having a hard time talking about the loss, talking with a counselor will give you a chance to circumvent some of the verbal processing of your grief. In addition, a counselor will teach you helpful coping strategies that incorporate deep breathing and mindfulness when you feel triggered by the loss. These methods will help you to regulate your emotions and coherently express your feelings.

If you feel like your life has ended and there is nothing to look forward to then grief counseling can help you get unstuck. Generally speaking, if you’ve been grieving for one year or more and still feel like you can’t move on then it’s wise to seek counseling.

Am I grieving or depressed?

It is important to recognize the difference between normal grief and clinical depression. Grief is not depression. However, grief can turn into depression. It is not uncommon for people to question whether they or someone they know is depressed after the death of a loved one. For most people, the emotional, mental and physical symptoms experienced after a death can be attributed to normal grief. However, this is not always the case. It is important to understand the difference between normal grief and clinical depression so the bereaved person gets the appropriate support or treatment.

If you find that you or a loved one identifies with several of the items in the depression column, it is important to consult with a physician or mental health provider. While depression is typically treated with psychotherapy and/or medication, grief is generally not treated with medication. Please seek help if you or a loved one is struggling with grief or depression.

Sources

(1) American Psychological Association. (n.d.). Grief. American Psychological Association. Retrieved April 2, 2023, from https://www.apa.org/topics/grief